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The Greek Cypriot Lexicon |
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One who drives a taxi. It is the ending of the word that is initially of interest from the ending jis
that actually means "one who is associated with". Thus we find the bagotajis – ice cream man (bagota pl. ice creams), cabaretjis, one who frequents cabarets, & the scoubajis who collects the scoubithia (rubbish) from your house.
It is worthy of note that the jis is generally a low status individual, if not in all truth a lowlife pure & simple. You will not find a hirougajis alias a surgeon, a trabezajis
– a bank worker or indeed a kivernijis – someone who works for the authorities, unless the speaker is treating them ironically. The taxijis
is something of a personification of this concept, though. He is seen often as a repository of knowledge on the locations of all the local cabarets
narcotics salespersons, crooks, thieves & thugs that any self-respecting individual might possibly want to find, hire or indeed avoid. With this in mind, think first whether or not you actually wish
to brave the stink of after shave & climb into his |
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Thallasa The Sea, principally in this case the Mediterranean as this is the sea of Cyprus but not exclusively. Interestingly
we also find thallasa used in a non-aquatic context specifically in the phrase egana to thallasa or literally "I made it a sea". This means that the speaker made a total & catastrophic hash
of whatever he was referring to. You will probably hear more frequently other derivatives of the phrase such as eganes to thallasa -"You made it a sea", or else egane to thallasa
– "He/she made it a sea." The likelihood of a Cypriot admitting guilt on this scale varies from slight to nil. God. The religion of Cyprus is Christian Orthodox, with one curious modification. The assumption appears to be that God is in truth a fellow Cypriot & thus is tolerant of minor technicalities such as adultery, vehicular murder, incest, & flagrant lack of charity provided they do not actually occur in his face. Whilst claiming to be a "religious" country, Cyprus has a vast population of working prostitutes, corruption to appease the gods & covets it's neighbour's ass to the point of poisoning it if it is bigger than their own. Some people are sincere in their beliefs & furthermore the population of properly accredited local saints is prodigious yet none of them seem to have been heard from recently & to be honest one can hardly blame them. After all, when you consider even the Archbishop of Limassol is currently under investigation for corruption, to who would they appear? Holidays. In Cyprus, the season for thiagopes represents a fascinating triumph of logic over
intelligence. Statistics from a few years back showed that 45% of the gross national product was from tourism, & 25% of that was from Britain. Thus Cyprus can truly be said to be a holiday island for
more reasons than the obvious sand & sun. It is in truth the lifeblood of the region & perhaps the largest single source of the "economic miracle" that followed the horrors of the 1974 Turkish invasion. With this in mind it is curious that the island shuts down in August for the local shopkeepers, hairdressers, pharmacies & a hundred other minor service industries to go on holiday. Their argument is
that they need a rest too & since August is holiday time on holiday they will go. The fact that in Cyprus you can still enjoy summer well into September is not a point which they are willing to consider, any
more than the fact that the shutting down of three quarters of the support services the (especially) self-catering tourist requires at the peak of the season. This should be considered in the light of the fact
that 95% of all businesses close early on Wednesday & Saturday. In the mesevriani
(siesta) season, namely June to October, close every day from 13.00hrs to 16.00 hrs anyway, a tradition established in the years before air conditioning.
Accordingly for the holidaymaker in Cyprus we have two pieces of August–time advice:-
1. Be careful, its hot. 2. Be careful, its closed.
A pick-up truck with seating accommodation for four persons. This essentially
agricultural vehicle was originally intended to offer the farmer a week-day work horse which was big enough & smart enough for the whole family at the weekend. As a working vehicle, the road tax was
correspondingly cheap & thus these diesel-powered monsters fast became the national vehicle of Cyprus. All was well, subject to the limitations of the
Sheet steel running boards, roo bars*, raised suspension, extra wide asphalt chewing tyres, anti police radar systems, batteries of high powered fog lights, modified exhaust systems, alloy wheel rims, blacked
out windows, custom paint jobs & anti roll bars are all common & indeed frequent additions to these once practical vehicles. Being purchased with the largest possible most turbocharged engines further enhances
their performance both as automobiles & as These
thiplowgambina (pl.) are so beloved by their owners that they are newer permitted to be any further than three to four meters from their owners at any time. They are driven to & indeed on to the beach with no regard
for other occupants. Usually they are loaded with It has been suggested that just as the ownership of a *
A cage of steel bars bolted onto the front of rural vehicles in the Australian outback to prevent damage from collision with kangaroos, or "roos" as they are called locally. These animals are prone to "freeze" in car headlights & being up to six feet tall can cause considerable damage on collision.
** Literally a "Bad luck". The this-
prefix frequently denotes something undesirable. In point of fact it equates to the English accident especially in the context of road accidents. These may also be describes as trochaia (pl.). Thisdichimata (pl.) are common occurrences in Cyprus, indeed there is hardly a five-mile stretch of Possibly in an attempt to come to terms with this, or else an attempt to avoid coming to terms with this, post
Thisdichima behaviour has been somewhat ritualised. (Unless those involved just ignore the accident and drive on to avoid paying on their insurance if they have any.)
1. If still alive and capable, both parties leap from their cars to assume a vigorously pre- 2. Stalk around the periphery of the accident snarling into your 3. If there is any possibility of your being to blame or else blamed, collapse at the roadside. Your removal to the
4. Women at this point collapse into either hysterics or tears. 5. Any minor injuries should be exaggerated. 6. When the police arrive to document the event, apportion blame and clear away
the spectators, an air of sulky injured innocence should be preserved and their instructions followed.
Do not confuse responsibility with the legal concept of blame, especially if the policeman is related to your your opposite number but not to you. Thromos A or the road. In the case of Cyprus, consider Pol Pot's*
killing fields but with more tarmac, better signposted & with decorative white/yellow stripes. This approach to the subject will probably bring you closest to the reality of the situation. The average Cypriot
othigos
is a danger to road users on a par with landmines. A large number of vehicles on the road are manufactured in Japan to less than European standards but despite their fragility are driven with a bravado worthy of a Challenger tank.
Visitors to Cyprus tend to make a surprising number of wildly inaccurate assumptions about the thromos
in believing it to be similar to the English road or highway. To reduce the risk engendered by these errors, please note the following differences.
1. Road markings. These purely decorative additions to the tarmac are used to make foreign visitors feel at home. No self-respecting Greek will consider them relevant to which side of the road he ought to
drive on. He simply chooses the side that currently is most appropriate to his needs, especially when cornering or at road junctions. The oncoming traffic is responsible for its own decisions in the area of evasive
action. This responsibility applies also to pedestrians & Zebra crossings light controlled or otherwise. The pavement is for pedestrians, assuming it is not being driven on, although it doubles as a parking area
if the othigos chooses to leave his car & become a pedestrian. 2. Speed limits. Rather than a firm instruction punishable under law, these constitute fatherly advice from the state with reference
to how fast they would go if they were you. Since most othigous
(pl.) left home long ago, the do not feel constrained to listen to parental advice however well meant. In many ways travelling at 95 kph in a 50 kph zone next to a nursery school is a demonstration of maturity & independence.
3. Traffic lights are viewed in the same light as speed limits, although there is some confusion about this. Othigous will urge you to respect the red light as an instruction, whilst they do not.
Perhaps they are colour blind & do not realise the one at the top means Stop" whatever its hue, or alternatively what they are really saying is "Love the lights, what are they for?" & you just
cannot them because the siren on the ambulance is too loud. 4. Parking. A car with it's engine running is being driven & therefore may be positioned anywhere its driver wants on the road. A car without
its engine running is parked, regardless of where it may be positioned anywhere on the road. Whereas the Americans term the handbrake the "Parking brake", the Cypriots have the "Parking key",
alias the ignition. Whether they are on double yellow lines, in the fast lane of a motorway, outside the main door of the casualty department of a busy hospital or on top of a screaming pedestrian, they turn the key
& walk away knowing their responsibility to their fellow road users is fulfilled. 5. Respect for other road users. Indicators, dipping headlights, Hand signals, (bar for the obscene), following road or
junction priorities & observing stopping distances mark the (usually foreign) driver as a limp wristed, timid fop who should sit in the back with his teddy & let his mother get on with the driving. He is not
to be taken seriously & is ignored or else laughed at & favoured with lavish displays of "manly driving". This covers the rigorous exclusion of any of the above whilst following rules 1-4.
6. Diversions due to problems with the road or traffic. Elsewhere than in Cyprus, a diversion sign effectively means "Do not go this way, go that way." A suitable alternative route being indicated.
In Cyprus it means, "Look, just go away, preferably somewhere over there." Following a single initial diversion sign will leave you without further guidance lost & confused in previously unmapped towns
& villages, in the middle of ploughed fields, on the brink of precipitous cliffs on the opposite side of the island or in the Turkish sector probably being shot at. 7. Highway code. This work of fiction
about a hypothetical utopian society is not to be confused with the British publication of the same name. It is soon to be a major motion picture starring one of Cyprus' leading comedians, assuming he survives the
journey to the studio. *Pol Pot, also Pol Porth or Tol Saut, pseudonym of Saloth Sar (1928- 1998), Cambodian guerrilla commander & political leader, generally considered responsible for the devastation of his country under the Khmer Rouge. Literally an immovably heavy or very unwieldy object. A stage or two beyond a dangalaka if you prefer. It is also a club or truncheon such as those employed by the British police force or their Turkish-Cypriot counterparts during the days when Cyprus was still under colonial rule. Hence the phrase tha fas topoozi. Literally "you will eat a truncheon", or more probably one will be fed to you regardless of your feelings on the matter. Further to this we have therefore the phenomenon of the topoozos. This is an individual who has been topoozied to & beyond the point of intellectual atrophy, or at least this is how they act. Consider the concept of the traditional village idiot after a frontal lobotomy.
Tourism. Tourism has existed for as long as people have been able to travel. The
narrative of Marco Polo in the 13th century; the British aristocracy's "grand tour" of t Europe in the 18th century; & the journeys of Victorian explorer David Livingstone through Africa in the 19th
century are all examples of early tourism. Thomas Cook is popularly regarded as the founder of inclusive tours when he chartered a train in 1841 to transport tourists from Loughborough to Leicester The dawn of high
volume Cypriot tourism was paradoxically after the 1974 Turkish invasion that rendered half of the island inaccessible. This industry was & is the cornerstone of the Cypriot economy contributing 45% of the national
product. Tourism is marginally different in Cyprus, however. In most places it is a multi-factorial service industry providing for the visiting tourist. In Cyprus it is more like a giant mangle for wringing
every last drop of cash from the visiting tourist up to & including their This tendency to beat the goose over the head with a
It has been argued that the unofficial policy of Cyprus with reference to tourists is:
1.That they should file off of the plane in an orderly fashion, 2.Leave all their cash & travellers' cheques at passport control 3.Push off home in order to recommend the island of Aphrodite to all their
friends without subjecting its inhabitants to the inconvenience of their presence. |
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This word is of Turkish origin & means credit, or more accurately the unofficial credit or
"tick" that you might have once obtained from the corner shop. Cyprus is built on veresieh & the new cars & vast spidia
are a testimony as to how easy this is to obtain, rather like England in the 1980's prior to the bursting of the economic bubble. The level of physical & psychological stress involved in maintaining the colossal
debts thus accrued is damaging to say the least & may account for the many examples of aberrant behaviour you will see during your stay here. Further it is a remarkable linguistic coincidence that the senior
psychologist/neurologist for Cyprus is the justly celebrated Kyriakos Veresiehs. A nice man & astonishingly popular |
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